Let it boot... Don't overwork the computer!!!

published Jun 06, 2007, last modified Jun 26, 2013

Ante Karamatic made me laugh today. Have you ever heard the following phrases when using someone else's computer?

Windows users often look at me while working on Windows, and have some 'smart' comments like 'Let it boot. Wait, it's not booted yet.', 'Why are you moving windows so much?', 'Do one thing, than another...'.

Well, Ante, I can sympathize, so you're not the only one. Much too often, dimwits whose computers I'm using will tell me exactly what you've quoted. Without exception, those dimwits are running Windows -- not ever have I heard these stupid "pearls of wisdom" from a Mac or Linux user.

Let it boot. Do one thing, then another.

Yeah, right. I do tens or thousands of things simultaneously with my computer, and it doesn't even flinch. Fucking dimwits! I don't know what makes me angrier:

  1. The fact that they don't know their computers are made expressly for multi-tasking.
  2. The fact that they're running Windows.
  3. The fact that they have the audacity to tell me, an experienced computer engineer, how to operate a computer correctly.
  4. The fact that they're afraid their computers will break just because I can and usually do several things at once with them.

Do one fucking thing, then another.

Fuck, for Jebus' sake! What, do you think your computer is going to break because I send it off to do several tasks at once? Come on, not even Windows is so fragile!

Why do people think like that? Well, it's a known phenomenon: people tend to assign magical properties to objects they don't understand. They simply cannot get their heads wrapped around the fact that computers are just numbers, so they think their computers run on mojo or magic, clicks from the mouse mapping to needle pricks in their voodoo dolls.

And boy do we know, as computer engineers, that computers are sufficiently advanced to be indistinguishable from magic!

However, since I'm feeling particularly benevolent today, I'm going to grant them this acknowledgement: yes, your computers boot like dogs on molasses. Which, of course, means only one thing: you've installed too much crapware, and it's time to reformat and reinstall. Morons.